Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Pet Peeves

Ok, it’s time to purge the soul. Lol. I have noticed that the majority of my posts are pretty positive, and while that’s not a bad thing per se, it’s always good to get rid of negative thoughts that unconsciously inhabit the mind. This will be my first “negative” post. I think what I am going to do is simply list my top ten pet peeves, things that others do that seem to really get under my skin (seems like a good place to start, doesn’t it?). Here goes…

Ashley’s Top Ten Pet Peeves

10.) People who “borrow” money with no intention of paying it back. I have had several people in my life borrow money from me, promising to pay it back and then don’t. This is why I no longer lend money to anyone except family (and even then I can be wary). Here’s my deal: If you want to borrow money and I have it, I have no problem letting it go. What I don’t understand is why people say they will pay you back knowing that they can’t or won’t. Maybe because they are afraid they won’t get to borrow the money if they say they can’t pay it back. Whatever the reason, don’t say it if you don’t mean it. I would rather someone be honest and say that they need the money but can’t pay it back. At least I will know what to expect. I don’t want to spend my time chasing someone down for my money. That is probably one of the quickest ways to lose me as a friend.

9.) People who steal from me. I do not tolerate thieves. There is no reason to steal from me because I consider myself to be a fairly giving person. Seriously, if you want something of mine so bad that you feel you have to steal it from me, then just ask me for it. I am the type of person who would give someone the shirt off my back if they needed/wanted it that bad. It pisses me off to no end when people or so-called “friends” take things that are mine.

8.) Bad Drivers. This is an extremely broad pet peeve but if I included each pet peeve behind the wheel, I could write several top ten lists. One thing I really can’t stand is when people ride your butt when a.) You are going the speed limit but they think you should be going faster and b.) There is plenty of room to switch lanes but they would rather try and bully you to go faster. And while I am on the subject of speeding, why do people feel the need to race down the street? I guarantee that they don’t get to where they are going that much sooner and it’s not worth the consequences. You might be speeding to save a few minutes and end up losing your life. Get a grip and drive the speed limit. It was obviously put in place for a reason! Another thing that irks me is when there is traffic on the highway and those who are furthest back take it upon themselves to drive on the shoulder and cut in front of everyone already waiting there!! Seriously, did their parents never teach them the common courtesy of waiting their turn? Then there are those who do not utilize the features on their car, such as a turn signal. Please let me know where you’re turning, so I don’t have to slam on my breaks at the last minute and almost crash into the backside of your car. And don’t even get me started on people who drive and talk/text on their cell phones. That is one of the most unsafe driving practices and it causes most people to swerve, drive too slowly, drive too fast and in general just don’t pay attention. Pull off to the side, make your oh-so-important call or text message and then get back out into traffic. If it’s not that important, then it can wait. Then there are those who ignore or simply disobey street signs. For example, there is a light that has two lanes, one of which is a turn lane and the other is to go straight only and people always try and go straight from the turn lane, especially if there is a long line of cars leading up to the light. Again, these people have no concept of turn-taking. And another thing, people who tend to perform the aforementioned driving actions always seems so indignant. Get over it! I honked at your dumb ass because you are in the wrong! Don’t get mad at me because you can’t drive and I had the guts to tell you about it. The thing is, they know they were wrong and just don’t like someone telling them how to drive. I don’t get annoyed by these things just to be a bitch; when someone is endangering my life by doing stupid things, I will not idly stand by. Driving is something that should be taken seriously and most people on the road only care about themselves and where they are going, not to mention trying to find the fastest way to get there possible. I just hope to make it from destination to destination in one piece.

7.) Rude and inconsiderate neighbors. We have all had them at some point or other. They are the ones who stomp around at 3 o’clock in the morning or the ones whose music is so loud, it sounds like as if it’s in your apartment. I’ve had my share of rude neighbors, especially since I lived in apartments for the majority of my life and I cannot understand the lack of consideration. You know, I even remember that when my sister and I were younger and lived on the top floor, my mom would always admonish us if we were making too much noise. My thinking is that if a seven year old and an eight year old can stifle the noise, why can’t an adult make the same concession? I’m not saying you have to walk around on tiptoe. Seriously, I don’t even really care about noise during the day, but anytime past ten or eleven (for sure midnight) is unacceptable. And what’s with the attitude of people when you request that they keep the noise level down? If I am polite enough to go over and ask you nicely, then I would hope for the same consideration back. Some of the neighbors I’ve had won’t even answer the door, which to that I say, ok. If you are not going to help remedy the issue, then I will call someone who will handle the problem (i.e. the cops).

6.) Rude people in general. I was brought up to have manners, respect for my elders and to be courteous. I’m not sure if other people did not have this upbringing or if they are just disrespectful as a human being, but it should be common knowledge. For example, if I’m at the grocery store, standing in front of an item you want, do NOT reach in front of me or walk in front of me without saying “excuse me.” It only takes two words and hardly any time at all to say it, so why not? Also, parents need to learn to teach their children about manners as well. When you have rude ass little kids, it’s only a reflection of the kind of parenting they’re receiving. Also, if someone opens a door for you, please say “thank you.” Again, only takes a second to say and it will only reaffirm my being kind in opening the door for you. I don’t think I would have such a problem with this one if these things weren’t so easy to do.

5.) People who talk about me behind my back. Ok, so I know that there will always be people who do not like me for whatever reason and I have no problem with that. What I hate is when people talk about me and I’m not there to defend myself. For example, my brother had a girlfriend awhile back whom I had never met before. I was on my way to my mom’s house to meet her, and while I was en route, she proceeded to say something negative about me. Not only had she never met me, but she didn’t even have the guts to say it to my face. If you have a problem with me, I am a big girl. Tell me to my face. Don’t go tell everyone else you know how I am this or that or whatever. I can handle criticism and negativity but if you cannot face me while you say it, then why say it at all? Doesn’t make much sense to me…and I never respond to comments made behind my back so it does absolutely no good except make whoever it is feel superior in some way. I’m just going to assume you’re jealous and move on.

4.) Waiting on people. I am a fairly punctual person. If I’m not on time, then I’m early. I do not like to be late to anything. So, if I tell you that I am going to be somewhere at a certain time, that’s when I will be there. I don’t like it when I’m not given that same courtesy. If I cannot make it, I will always let that person know. It may be that same day, but I try my best not to be late or a no-show. If I have planned to meet someone at a pre-determined time, I expect them to be there. I generally do not mind waiting 5 or so minutes for someone who may have had some kind of hold-up or something, but any longer than that, I’m going to be hard-pressed to keep waiting around. My deal with this is that my time (just like anyone else’s) is precious. I just don’t want to spend all my time waiting on other people.
3.) Pretending to be someone or something you’re not. I am me. You are you. Let’s keep it that way. I generally try to be myself at all times. And even though I may adjust or fine-tune my behavior to match the situation (for example, I’m obviously not going to act the same at a work function as I would something more casual, like hanging out with friends), I am always true to the person I am. I don’t like seeing other people think that the only way they can be acknowledged is by pretending to be someone they are not. I’m sure we have all known a person like this at some point in our lives. All I’m saying is to be true to yourself because that’s the only person you will ever be.

2.) When people “borrow” things and either don’t give them back or loan to someone else. If you ask me to “borrow” something, it is generally implied that you are going to give it back. If you would like to have something of mine, all you have to do is ask. I am not hung up on material items, so if someone asks to borrow something and doesn’t return it, then I would consider it stealing (which is my #9 pet peeve). I would say that if you’re going to borrow something from someone, these are the rules: 1.) You must give it back within an appropriate time lapse unless expressly otherwise understood, 2.) You should give it back, period, 3.) You should return it in the condition it was given to you and 4.) You should not let anyone else borrow it unless the owner has given you permission to do so. That last one sounds much like a no-brainer, but I have had that happen to me. If you borrow something, that does not make it yours; therefore, you have no right or authority to let anyone else take possession of it. If you loan out something that doesn’t belong to you, you are responsible for that person’s actions as well. I truly hate it when you ask for something back that you let someone borrow and their reply is, “I lent it to so-and-so. You need to talk to them.” No, I lent it to YOU, which makes you accountable. I also think if the person cannot follow those rules for borrowing, they should either have to replace the item borrowed or give you the monetary equivalent. It’s only fair.

1.) Freeloaders. This, to me, is almost like stealing. It’s essentially people trying to soak up the excess of something they did not contribute to. For example, let’s say you have a couple of siblings and your mom’s 50th birthday is coming up. You do all the work, buy the cake, decorate the house, etc…and your siblings never offer to lift a finger or help pay for it. Then, when it’s time for the party, they try and pretend that they helped. If you want to be recognized for something, then you actually have to do something. It’s completely unfair to let other people do all of the dirty work, while you get to reap the benefits of that hard work. Same thing if you live at home, don’t contribute and you’re over 18 years old. It’s not fair that you live somewhere rent-free and not only don’t help with money, but don’t even lift a finger to help around the house. You only earn what you tend to. If you didn’t do anything, don’t act like you did. And don’t act like you don’t know why everyone is looking at you with narrow eyes if you do act this way. Grow up; get off your lazy butt and do some work, plain and simple.